I’m a white lady and I’m a wig wearer. I have shitty awful hair and I have no self-delusions such as, by weaving in a few extensions, I would be able to enhance what God gave me. Do I think that when I go out to the Jewell Osco for my Klondike bars that anyone will notice I’m wearing a wig? Yes! In fact, everyone thinks I’m a drag queen which is exactly the look that I’m going for. You don’t get to be famous like me by not standing out from the crowd, especially if you’ve been “blessed” with shitty awful hair.
But ladies, if you are white and you don’t want to stand out from the crowd and yet you want to have beautiful hair: PLEASE don’t try and wear a wig or a weave or get extensions made for a black girl. Women of color look wonderful bald, natural, wigged out, braided and weaved. It’s the skin tone, girls. Color has so much to do with texture in fabrics, wall paint AND people. If you put a texture or color or a “density” that it too thick or rich against a light color, it will look heavy, lumpy or jump away from the lightness.
Think about this: if I’m an African American woman, I can put on a lime green sweater, put some orange eye shadow on my lids and red lipstick on my lips. And, before I walk out the door, I can flip on one of my famous “Judy wigs” and go to the grocery store. Do you think I’d look like a drag queen? NOT! Those colors and textures, and even the hair, would take a back seat to my skin tone. I’d look lovely and: lucky me, if I were a black woman…
So what if you are a white chick who has shitty awful hair and you just want to have hair that looks great when you go out in public? I’m assuming you want this hair to look real and natural. Here are my tips:
- Buy at wig in the style you like and don’t buy an expensive one! Synthetic is good until you graduate up to “real.”
- Pick a color that won’t “jump” off your white skin! The more dense the color, the more dark colors you will have to wear in your clothes and makeup to carry it off.
- Wear that wig to a stylist who will razor the crap out of it until the density is the same as someone your age would actually have. WARNING: A white stylist may not know what they are doing: “razor?!” And a black hairdresser might not take off enough hair because they know how much hair costs and they don’t need to take hair off a black women’s wig.
- If you opt for extensions or weaves, make sure you stay away from the hairlines and crown. The lightness of your skin shows through the knits and clips and only points out what’s goin’ on up there.
- Remember, you better not be doing dreadlocks, braids and colorful textures if they don’t fit your personality. You’re not me.
I rest my case.
This is Judy, telling it like it is, bobbing my head side to side, trying to be cool like some of my friends and failing miserably–over and out. Comment at will.
